“It’s Not the Tacos… It’s the Culture: Step One”

Have you ever walked into a church and thought, wait, did I just crash someone's party? You know what I mean? Everyone's laughing, talking, connecting, and you're standing there like a dweeb, asking yourself, do I belong here? That awkward feeling. That's just not social, it's culture. And when the culture's off, everything feels off. But here's the good news. Today I'm starting a five-part series. I'm calling this the Great Church Culture Blueprint. Each week, we're going to take a deep dive into these steps and give you a practical way to implement them into your church. I've been a part of church for a long time, and I've seen all five of these steps work. And I think you can apply them and create a culture that will work for you. So let's jump right in and get started. Hello, everyone, and welcome to the Speak on Purpose podcast. I am Brian Cox, your host, and today we're talking about the five steps that will help us create a great church culture. Let me list those for you and then we'll talk about them. Step one, read it. Step two, write it. Step three, model it. Step four, practice it. Step five, preach it. That's read it, write it, model it, practice it, and preach it. Let's jump into step one. Read it. I call this read the room. So let me give you an example of this. A few weeks ago, I was out of town and we decided to try a new Mexican restaurant because we love Mexican food and we pretty much have it every week. So we tried this restaurant. Hopefully, it's going to be good. We walked in and nobody greets us. Just silence. We just stood there for a long time. But there's a hostess stand, there's a hostess, and she's not interested in being a part of my story. I looked at her and I said, Do we see it ourselves? You know, maybe it's one of those where you find your own seat, serve your own food. I didn't know. And she finally looks up and says, Oh, yeah, you can sit anywhere. You know, that's like restaurant code for good luck. I find a seat and we're sitting there trying to be patient. You know, I'm a pastor. I'm I'm telling myself, be patient. It's fine. They're probably busy. They weren't. I counted. There were maybe three other people there, and two of them looked like they worked there. Before I had even ordered or looked at the menu, I'm like, yeah, we're not coming back. Why? The vibe, the culture. I felt like I was at the DMV, we know how that feels, waiting on my number to be called. I couldn't wait to leave. The people working there, not that they were bad people, but they had not been taught. They did not understand their customer. They did not understand the culture of the restaurant. They did not know what they were doing. And the result was we were having a poor experience. Sounds like church sometimes. People walk into church expecting one thing and they get another. Now, I go to my favorite spot when I'm home. It's called El Sereno, and it's in Powdersville. Yes, I'm giving a shout out to these guys. They're awesome people. El Sereno in Powdersville. We go pretty much every Friday. And it's a whole different story when we go there. We go pretty much every week. We walk in, they treat us like family, they're smiling and waving. Ashley's our waitress most of the time. And we try to get in her section, and she lights up when she sees us, and we light up when we see her. We cannot wait to say hey. We know each other's kids' names, and it's just so much fun to be welcomed. You know, it's the same food, literally, the same tacos. Maybe the chips and saucer are different, but somehow it always tastes better when I go to El Cerino. And it's because of the culture. That's when I realize it's not the tacos, it's the culture. They were glad to see us. They understood what the room needed to feel like. They read the room. They were taught what culture needs to be. And you know, culture is that invisible thing that shapes every interaction, every first impression, every person's experience. Now hear this. Before they even hear the sermon, they've probably made up their mind. And you know, culture is the reason some churches grow and some churches don't. I'm sure there's other factors, but this is one we really don't pay attention to. We make the best tacos, but we serve them with an attitude and without love, without care. That doesn't work. And if you don't pay attention to culture, it will take a life on of its own and it'll create a culture you don't want. We have to be intentional. We have to read the room. So here, step one, take a few Sundays. Just watch what's happening before the service even begins. When people are gathering, when people are coming in from the parking lot, are the volunteers huddled with friends instead of welcoming newcomers? Is that single mom juggling three kids at check-in? Does anybody notice? Or is she being overlooked? Culture lives in these small moments. Every handshake, every smile, every hello adds up. Do this. Asked a trusted team member to spy on the parking lot, to spy on the lobby, and bring you observations. Now don't be defensive. Just listen and learn. What is the culture saying? And awareness is the first step toward change. You want to change your culture? You need to read the room. You need to be aware of what's happening. People decide if they're coming back long before the sermon starts. Culture is what people feel before a word is even spoken.